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Rodney Carrington's Plan For World Peace

This made me laugh. It's probably NSFW unless your work let's you look at some naked boobies.

I've Gained My Composure Somewhat

Well, yesterday was a sad day. I bawled so much that I look like an alcholic with a big, red nose. I still can't believe Loco's gone.

I called the vet yesterday morning to see how Loco was doing and to see what time I could pick him up. The vet got on the phone and said that Loco didn't make it through the night. I just sat on the floor and bawled. My daughter was walking around in circles almost gathering all her stuffed animals to bring to me to make me feel better. She brought me one of her stuffed cats and said, This is Loco, Mama. It's okay, Mama. Pretty amazing when your 2 1/2 year-old does everything she can to make you feel better. That's when I realized I was freaking her out, so I tried to quit bawling. Every few minutes she'd ask me, Are you crying, Mama? She's so sweet. She doesn't realize it, but she's going to miss that cat. She always said he was her best friend. She called him Coco because she couldn't say Loco. Last night while in bed she said, I miss Coco - Coco's in the hole and he can't meow.

We buried him yesterday. And after that, I felt a little better. Last night, we went to my mother's house for a bon voyage party for my sister and her husband. They're going to Europe for about a month for their 25th wedding anniversary. It was nice to visit with my family. Anyway, I appreciate everyone listening to my Loco saga. And, Sam, we left a note with Loco that said we'd meet him at the bridge. You don't know how much better you made me feel by telling me that.

Loco

Loco didn't make it

He Made It Through Surgery

Well, Loco has made it through the surgery to remove his limb, paw, leg whatever you want to call it. They say he's doing good. His vital signs are all good. I went by and saw him a couple of hours ago and -- well, his leg's gone. They had him laying on a heating pad. He's seriously drugged up on pain medicine. He was breathing real funny, but they said that was normal due to the anesthesia and the pain medicine they have him on. They opened the cage door for me and I said, Loco, and he jerked his head back kind of like he recognized my voice. Makes me cry thinking of him laying there. Also, they didn't find any tumors or lumps or anything that could have possibly caused his leg to do this. The only other thing they could think of that might have caused this was a snake bite, and there was no evidence of that. Plus, Loco is an inside cat only - never, ever goes outside (except for the other day when we took him outside for about 10 minutes and watched him the whole time). And there damn sure aren't any snakes in our house. Keep the good thoughts coming his way, please. Thank you!

Loan

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some
collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says...

"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

Thanks, Peggy

I Feel Like I'm Playing Ping Pong

So Loco jumps on the couch by me this morning. I look at his paw and it's oozing - I mean, oozing bad. I call the vet and we've decided to go ahead and do the paw amputation. The vet said she'd seen worse numbers on other cat's kidney function. I don't know what else to do. We can't have a cat running around with an oozing stump. He acts like the same old Loco other than that damn paw. If he was acting sick, like throwing up or sleeping all the time or something, I would have no problem putting him to sleep, but I just can't do that right now. He acts fine to me other than the limp. So he goes tomorrow for the amputation. If he doesn't make it through the surgery, then I know I've done everything I could for him.

(Do you like my circa 1970 panelling? I don't. Check out the mug on the shelf. My grandpa was a Pearl Harbor survivor. Can you imagine being a Pearl Harbor survivor and all you get is a lousy mug? That reminds me of those tshirts - My mom and dad went to Vegas and all I got was this lousy tshirt. My mind is twisted. Too much ping ponging going on in there lately.)

Mental Hospital

I was walking past the mental hospital the other day,and all the patients were shouting ,'13....13....13'
The fence was too high to see over,but I saw a little gap in the planks and looked through to see what was going on.
Someone poked me in the eye with a stick.
Then they all started shouting '14....14....14'...

Thanks, Mom. I needed that.

Loco, Loco, Loco

Well, got a call from the vet this morning after I dropped Loco off. They did a blood analysis, test, whatever you want to call it and Loco's kidneys are bad. Something was at 27 in February and now it's at 65. The normal of something else is 2.4 and his is at 7.9 Needless to say, they didn't do the surgery on him. I went back and forth in my head about what to do...put him to sleep or bring him home for a while. Since he doesn't appear to be in any pain, I brought him home. I've bawled all morning. I am a bawlbag that loves her cat.

Procrastination

If I had any doubts at all about whether or not I was a procrastinator, they're gone now. I am the queen.

Rindercella

I used to have a cd that had Rindercella and my all time favorite, Snuff Dipper by Archie Campbell of Hee-Haw fame on it. I played it so much, I wore it out. Can't find Snuff Dipper anywhere.

I don't know how to upload audio files, so here's a link to the mp3.

Waltzing Matilda

I remember learning this song in the fifth grade in Mrs. Milrany's class. I had no idea until right now what this song pertained to.

Loco Becomes A Tripod

This is part three or four of the continuing Loco saga. You've seen the picture of Loco up there before. Do you see where his paw is turned under? Well, that part of his paw is basically "dead". How in the hell did this happen? I don't know. It may be a tumor of some kind up under his kitty pit. I found a wonderful vet in Pantego that will be amputating his entire kitty arm tomorrow, including his shoulder blade. It sounds horrendous to me and I bawled a lot Thursday when I found out that this was the only way to help him. Some people might think I'm crazy, but some people think I'm crazy anyway. The total cost of the surgery is going to be actually cheaper than his first visit to the "vet from hell" that I took him to with his busted ear drum/supposed almost kidney failure.


In the pic up there, you can see where it looks sort of red and bloody and raw. If you get real close, you can see what looks like tendons or something showing through. It makes me cry to even think about how much pain he's going to be in and what he's going to look like and how he's going to get around on three legs. I have to drop him off in the morning between 7:30 and 8:00 and I'll pick him up Tuesday. I'll let y'all know Tuesday how he's doing. If you get a chance, send some good thoughts his way.

I found this great article about cat limb amputation.

Our Little Egghead

Papa Rooster is probably going to stomp around like a bear because I posted a picture of our precious daughter. But don't get your fur in a bunch, Big Daddy. I'm posting it for a reason. You see Five Minutes For Mom is having a Mother's Day Photo Contest and the prize is a $1000 American Express gift card provided by Egg Beaters. And since Big Daddy always fails to remember Mother's Day, if I win, his butt won't get chewed out by me when he forgets it again this year - well, maybe not chewed out as bad.

You're supposed to post a motherhood-inspired picture on your blog. To me this picture of our little shorty describes motherhood - well, it describes what motherhood is to me. The look of pure joy on her face and the ketchup smeared on her cheeks. Don't get much better than this -- in my eyes anyway.