Someone's instant boob job from 36A to 36DD - and my take on big boobs vs. little boobs

Here's a snippet of this story:

"Had all the men in Oxford gone mad overnight? The postman started it. When I opened the door, he stood there grinning like a Cheshire cat, and lingered rather longer than necessary while I signed for a package. "

"Worse – or was it better? – was to come. In Sainsbury's not one but two men offered to let me go ahead of them in the queue."

"Another wanted to know if I needed help packing my groceries away. Another still wanted to open my car door for me in the car park. "

"In my local delicatessen, Gluttons, the man behind the counter smiled and nodded like an eager puppy as I bought such mundanities as olive oil and courgettes."

"But it was the (male) librarian at my local library who really seemed to have lost his marbles."

The rest of the story here: My instant boob job from 36A to 36DD - and the effect it had on men (and women) the Daily Mail


My two cents: If you know me or have ever seen me, you know I didn't write this story. I haven't seen a 36A since I was in the 7th grade or so. With nicknames such as Dairy Queen, Saggems, and the constant "milk it does your body good, pass it on" commercial being shouted every time I saw a particular individual in high school, I can honestly say that I have no sympathy for people who have small breasts.

It's a lot easier to make small boobs look bigger than it is to make huge boobs look smaller - it's nearly impossible. You can't just go to any store and buy a bra. I have to order mine online and the minimum price starts at about $50 for one.

That article I posted the other day about women's bras, I could not believe the average woman owns 13 bras and they paid $13 for each. They must all be size 36A or 36C or the "new" 36D. I can tell you one thing, if I had a bra from about ten years ago that was a size 36DDD, it would measure the same as a new 36C bra.

I went to Foley's or Dillard's the other day and asked to be fitted. She wrapped the measuring tape around me right there in front of God and everybody and then told me I was a 38D. I said, Lady, you must be out of your freakin' mind. You need to get your happy ass enrolled in some kind of measurement-taking class because I haven't worn a 38D since 1985. Okay..okay. I didn't actually say that to her, but that's damn sure what I was thinking. This just goes to show you that you should get fitted at more than one store.

Why is it that people think the larger your cup size, the larger the band size? That's the opposite of men's pants - the larger the band size, the shorter the length. Not every big-busted woman wears a size 40 or 42 band size. And not every rotund man is short. I would like to know where the women who have fake boobs buy their bras. Of course their bras are probably all made out of tissue paper or spider webs - unlike mine which are made out of elephant skin with rawhide straps.

Okay. I'm done. I'll quit my bitchin.